Embracing Eternity Read online

“Is that the only threat they pose?”

  She shook her head and hugged her arms even tighter around her middle, looking for all the world like a shadow trying to fade into itself and vanish. “They act as spies. They watch the archdemons and Creation for Lucifer.”

  If any had escaped, they would bring Lucifer right to the island. Evan would have to disguise their presence here.

  He looked back at the last of the demon ash before him. Evan wasn’t sure what all of this meant, but he knew it was vital information. These were things angels had never known about the demons, important facts that could make a difference in how angels battled them and defended Creation.

  “The archangels need to know of this.” Ren needed to know too. In his heart, Evan knew this held the key to bringing Meela home.

  He just couldn’t figure out how.

  “You are leaving?”

  “Hmm?” He tore his attention away from the creature and turned back to Meela. She hugged herself tightly, her tiny wings held tight against her back. The winter wind whipped her hair around her body and she shivered.

  She looked so frightened and helpless. The demonform, which should appear menacing, instead only heightened her fragility.

  More of those things could be in the brush, watching them, waiting for a chance to attack her. She didn’t have enough power to withstand an assault like the one he’d just experienced, nor was she strong enough to leave this place to seek more. Even now, his wounds were healing, nearly gone while her small scratches still bled. Meela didn’t have anywhere out here to get power she would need to heal except from him.

  And he’d been forbidden to offer it to her.

  In his ignorance, he’d managed to box them both in.

  He couldn’t leave her unprotected. Not until she’d asked him for power and fed.

  “I won’t leave. I can speak with him later,” he assured her. Rising to his feet once more, he crossed the clearing and took her into his arms. Her body felt chilled against his.

  “This…is not important then?”

  “No, this is very important. We never considered the possibility that these lesser demons could be destroyed. Being able to eliminate them will make a very big difference in how we guard and protect Creation.”

  “Then why aren’t you rushing the Pearly Gates with the news?”

  “Because right now, you need me more.”

  For a moment she simply stared at him, uncertainty in her eyes. “I’m nothing but a demon. How can I be more important than sharing this with the archangels?”

  “How can you think you’re not? Meela, you are everything to me. You always have been.”

  Huffing in irritation, she wriggled out of his arms and stalked back toward the opposite side of the clearing. “Sometimes I’m not sure if you are stubborn or a fool, Evan. Heaven is not my home, not anymore.”

  “But what if it could be?” he asked, following her. “Would you want to?”

  All she had to say was yes. All she had to do was ask and he’d move the Heavens for her.

  She stopped then, turning to look at him. The dull gray light of winter seemed to vanish against her scaled skin and her red eyes sparkled like rubies against the matte darkness of her flesh.

  “I used to wish that I’d never followed Lucifer, that when Renatus read the list of my sins that I had swallowed my pride and asked forgiveness. But wishing and regrets do no good. Thinking about what I’d lost only made the pain worse. What’s done is done and I can’t go back.”

  He didn’t want to accept that, didn’t want to give up hope after so many years of hopelessness.

  “You’re an angel. You belong in Heaven.”

  “I never realized you were so damn stubborn.” Her hands came up to hold his head still, to force him to look in her eyes. “Look at me, Evan. I’m a demon, and my place is in Hell. Don’t ask me to imagine or pretend there can be anything else, because when pretending is over, reality will come back and I’ll lose Heaven all over again.”

  The pain in her eyes was so stark it made his heart ache.

  “Meela—”

  A small bush near the edge of the clearing exploded with movement. Evan spun, prepared for another attack. Meela skittered away from him, her eyes wide and fearful.

  A dozen sparrows winged their way toward the mainland. Evan tried to calm his racing heart. Birds.

  He turned back to Meela and found her eyeing the tree line.

  “They could be anywhere.”

  “It was just birds.” He reached for her but she shied away. Ignoring the shaft of hurt, he stepped closer and took her in his arms. “The demons are gone.”

  “You can’t know that. They could be here now, watching. They’ll tell Lucifer.”

  “I’ll keep you safe.” He held her tight against him and surrounded her with a shielding cocoon. Lucifer wouldn’t touch her. No matter what Evan had to do, he’d protect her from the Devil.

  He let his power seep into her, warming but not feeding her. It rubbed against the vestiges of her scant power, testing her strength and buffering her weakness.

  Her breath caught on a tiny gasp and he suddenly became aware of her nipples, tight with the cold, pressing into him through the fine fabric of her shirt. Thoughts of Lucifer and the lesser demons vanished. He forgot about keeping Meela hidden. Evan couldn’t think past the cold-hardened nipples thrusting into his chest.

  The power flowing from him changed. He could feel it become something different than it had ever been before. Hotter. Needier. Meela felt it too. She went still in his arms; only the slightest trembling let him know how much the change had affected her.

  As her desire peaked, it fed back to him. A thread of arousal laced its way through the energy, making it even richer, more potent.

  A wavering sigh escaped her and her body began to relax, to melt into his.

  He could seduce her. The realization rushed through him on a wave of fire. The demon was ripe for tempting and he was her forbidden fruit.

  The urge to take her and fill her with his power and mark her as his was so strong, almost overwhelming. He buried his nose in her hair, breathing in her smoky scent, considering. Meela, his. Forever.

  But to do so would violate a direct order from not one, but three archangels.

  “Ask me, Meela.” Merciful Heavens, she had to ask. One word and he’d be free to give her every bit of power in him, to give her everything he had, his want, his need.

  His love.

  He dipped his head and nuzzled the last vestiges of her injury. Evan kissed the spot again, this time letting the tip of his tongue trace over the vanishing ridges of scars.

  He nipped, dragging the edges of his teeth over her skin with a gentle scrape.

  “Evan, I—”

  The words seemed to stall in her throat and Meela tensed with a whimper. Her entire body twitched and the sensual energy pooling in her became tinged with fear once more.

  “Shh…” he soothed. “It’s just me. Just Evan. I will not hurt you.”

  He kissed her neck again, waiting for her to calm before he dragged his teeth along the healing skin again. She tipped her head and moved back slightly to look at him. He caught a glimpse of the protest in her eyes and did the only thing he could think of to stop it from crossing her lips.

  He kissed her.

  In an instant, heat blazed between them. Power, a dizzying whirlwind of energy and emotion, surrounded them and he fought to hold it back. He held her tighter, desperate to keep them both from toppling over in the snow from the pure force of what exploded between them.

  He could never tire of this. To finally hold her, finally feel her sweet lips against his.

  He had been waiting for this since before time began.

  She wriggled against him, freeing her arms to wind them around his waist. Angling his head, he slipped his tongue past her lips and the flow of want magnified, hit with such force his knees went weak and his every feather prickled.

  Evan had to force
himself to hold back his power, to keep it in check. He pulled his wings forward, surrounding her in warmth, blocking out the world and holding her tight against his body.

  “Stay with me, Meela,” he whispered against her lips. “Leave him and come home with me.”

  Stiffening, she pulled her mouth away from his and took an audible breath.

  “I can’t.”

  “I’ll find a way. I swear I will. Just say the word.”

  He allowed the temptation to linger. Time passed in the thunder of his heart and the burn of bated breath. Her face twisted in pain, and tears filled her crimson eyes.

  “I want to stay with you, Evan. Please. I want to stay.”

  Evan didn’t hesitate, didn’t ask her to confirm this was what she wanted. He’d spent too long watching her from afar, waiting for her to say yes.

  He enfolded them in power, hid them from the prying eyes of the Realms. The bubble surrounding them hid the harsh reality of winter, projecting the illusion of a sultry summer day in its place.

  The skeletal trees surrounding them seemed to burst forth leaves and birdsong filled the air. He created a bed of soft grasses and wildflowers and laid them on it. In the midst of a dead winter, Evan created the illusion of an Earthly paradise.

  All for Meela. All to give her the beauty she deserved.

  It was incredible, almost unbelievable that after more than ten thousand years of seeing her lost, wandering, millennia of wanting from afar, Meela was finally in his arms.

  He wrapped his wings around them. Slipping his fingers into the mass of her dreadlocks, he tugged and tipped her face up to his. Evan brushed his lips over hers in the barest of kisses, as if that one little act could tell her just how much he cherished her.

  She shivered in his arms, a fine tremor that exposed her fear as surely as an earthquake.

  “He’ll find us.”

  There was no question of whom she spoke.

  Lucifer. The Devil himself haunted Meela.

  Evan poured more power into the illusion surrounding them, shielding them from the eyes of any being who might be searching. Over their heads, the false sky brightened more. He filled the air with birdsong and the lush heat of summer.

  “He will not find us. I’ll hide us away and no one will.”

  “We can’t hide forever.”

  “No, but we can for now.” He tipped her chin up until she looked at him, willed her to really see him, just once. “Give me now, Meela. You give me now and I’ll give you forever.”

  Her eyes filled with tears. She didn’t believe, he could see it in her eyes, but she nodded anyway.

  She’d believe soon enough. Renatus would find the answer and Evan would take his Fallen angel home to be redeemed.

  He dipped his head and kissed her once more, this time holding nothing back. He poured into her every bit of love and longing, every drop of power that he possibly could. Her barriers dropped and it flowed openly between them. Hers came to him soiled and tainted and he cleansed it before channeling it back to her.

  The energy built between them, charging him until his skin seemed to crackle with want. Blood flowed hot and thick to his cock and his muscles tensed with the need to move.

  The tide of mutual arousal seemed to have just the opposite effect on Meela. Where he went hard, she softened. Where he tensed, she relaxed. She pressed into him, surrendering with a sigh.

  The power between them shifted with their desire, flowing from him to her and back again in an unending circle. With one arm, he lifted her over him until her body was draped over his and he could feel her every curve through the barrier of their clothes.

  Meela clutched at him, taking the lead. Her lips parted and he followed suit, operating more on mimicry and instinct than knowledge. Their tongues tangled and a growling noise escaped him.

  He was strong, powerful, overwhelmed by the desire to plunder the soft, feminine body pressed so tight against him.

  Was this what physical love did to a male?

  But then Meela shifted, rubbing her soft belly against his throbbing cock, and Evan understood that arousal didn’t make a male strong; it made him weak, helpless as a fledgling.

  Meela shifted again, using her entire body to stroke his. His gossamer robes slid between them, caressing his skin. Pulling her mouth from his, she made her way down his body. Her sharp teeth grazed over his throat and he shivered at the sensation.

  She was holding back. He was at her mercy and she knew it, but she wouldn’t let those sharp canines do any damage, not even the slightest scratch.

  Evan closed his eyes and tipped his chin up, baring his throat, giving her his trust. Her lips and teeth drifted over his skin, sending ripples of pleasure over him. Through their shared power, he could feel her pleasure as well, a smug satisfaction.

  That discordant emotion forced his eyes open. Meela had shifted again, changing into a more angelic form. She was beautiful, looking so much like her heavenly self that he could almost let himself believe she was already redeemed, ready to take her place once more among the Host.

  The fairest of the angels, ready to come home.

  She parted the neck of his robes and eased her way down his body, teasing him with nibbles and flicks of her tongue over his skin. Her nails traced over the contours of his chest and the delicate scrape sent shivers through him.

  Evan trembled, helpless under her mouth and hands. With another shift, she was nibbling his abdomen. A small tug from her had his robes falling open completely.

  Her mouth inched over his skin, licking, nipping. She paused to nip her way around his navel, then her head dipped. Without warning, she took him in her mouth, sucking him deep and hard.

  Evan couldn’t stop his strangled groan. His spine arched and he tried to thrust deeper, to where her throat closed tight over the head of his cock.

  The heat of hellfire and Heaven’s paradise met in her mouth. She held him helpless, a captive to her ministrations. His wings beat helplessly against the earth as her tongue stroked him. Merciful Heavens. Was it possible for an angel to die from sheer pleasure?

  She pulled back, sucking hard as she did, so hard it felt as if his cock would explode from the wet slide of her full lips over his shaft. Just before his cock came free, she bobbed her head, setting up a fast rhythm.

  The wet slide of her lips over him, the stroke of her tongue and the sweet suction was too much. His hands came up and he tangled his fingers through her hair to hold her.

  Meela stiffened, going still and stiff as stone at his touch.

  Evan released her, but brought his wings around to keep her close. Jerking away, she backed as far as his embracing wings would allow, her eyes hard.

  “Did I do something wrong?”

  She appeared to have to think about that one. “No. I just…”

  He let her leave his arms, but kept her under his wings. Not that this would block her escape. She had enough power in her now to simply vanish.

  But she stayed, leaning against his plumage in silent demand that he not touch. A request he respected, even though every feather was twitching with the need to hold and shelter her.

  “I don’t like being held.” Meela’s voice was sharp, demanding that he respect her wishes.

  Evan tipped his head to one side, studying her and trying to search for hidden meaning in her words. He found only simple truth.

  “I cannot hold you when we make love?”

  “Sex, Evan. It’s sex. It has nothing to do with love.” Her brow arched haughtily and he felt the sting of her disdain.

  “It has everything to do—”

  “Do not try to educate me when you know nothing.”

  Evan stiffened his spine and pulled his wings from around her, releasing her to tighten them against his spine. “I know enough—”

  “No, you don’t. Don’t try to pretend. You are a virgin who knows nothing of what happens between a male and female. You think it’s all love but you’re wrong. Sex isn’t love, it’s two b
odies rutting. It’s power and domination.”

  Her truth rang clear, honest and untarnished by the taint of demon. In those words, Evan saw the last ten thousand years of Meela’s existence. He saw her battered, bruised and broken by Lucifer’s hand, saw the angel who once gave affection so freely being robbed of the gift of her love until she had nothing left.

  “I want to give it back to you.” His words were barely a whisper, but she heard. Her breath caught on a choking gasp and her wings gave a violent flutter before she flattened them against her back.

  Oh yes, she heard.

  “I should not have agreed to this. The idea that the two of us could have even stolen moments is ridiculous. Forget about this, about me, Evan. Go back to Heaven where you’ll be safe.”

  Her face contorted in pain and her body twitched, as if the thought of sending him away caused her physical pain.

  He hoped it did. He hoped that the thought of him leaving tormented her.

  Because that would mean she loved him.

  He shifted to reach across the distance she’d placed between them. With one finger under her chin, he tipped her face upward until she was forced to look into his eyes once more.

  “You are the one I love and I will never forsake you.”

  She tried to pull away. “Evan—”

  “No.” He brushed his thumb over her lips, quieting her. “You spoke already. Now I will talk.”

  Meela pressed her lips together and her eyes gleamed with defiance, but she let him have his say.

  “What you have known since leaving the fold is an abomination, a grotesque parody of an act meant to be the ultimate demonstration of love.”

  He could see the words roll over her, rippling over her consciousness but not sinking in. Simple reassurance made no impression in ten thousand years of abuse.

  He shifted to kneel before her. Gently brushing her hair back from her face, he infused his touch, his words, his presence with as much reassurance as he could.

  “Love gives, it doesn’t take. It accepts instead of alters and isn’t proven with acts of obedience. You call me naive and innocent, and it’s true. I have not shared this love with another, haven’t given of myself to anyone, because there is only one I love enough to give my soul.”